|
|
|
My wife likes to dance. I hate to dance! She married me anyway! Fortunately, dancing was not high on our priority list for marriage compatibility. Once in awhile we will find ourselves at a wedding reception where people are dancing. It never fails. Kim always asks me to dance with her. Inside, I fight this battle...to dance or not to dance. The issue usually gets settled when I think about whether or not I want to have a grumpy wife for the rest of the evening. And so I literally have to force my feet to take me onto the dance floor. It's not that I don't enjoy being close to my wife. It's just that it brings back such terrible memories. When I was in junior high in Hamilton, Ohio, the big thing was to go to the dance every Friday night at the YMCA. It was dark. The music was loud. And the wall was my constant friend. I didn't know what I was doing there. I just knew it had something to do with my hormones. The desire to dance with a girl was so strong, and yet the fear was paralyzing. So every Friday night at the YMCA was an experience of exhilaration and mortal fear. I learned that my body was something that did not belong in the spotlight of the dance floor, but rather in the shadows on the side. Do you teens have conflicting experiences like this? On one hand you want desperately to do something, to wear something, to be like someone else, to be popular, but paralyzing fear keeps you from acting on your desires. Your mom or dad asks you basic questions about your life. Part of you wants to talk with them about what’s going on in your life. But that stubborn attitude takes over and makes your mouth say, "I don’t know." What is it about teens and parents that there is this built-in animosity? When I was a teen I had three worlds. There was the world of my family, the world at church, and the world of my friends at school. I spoke a different language in each world. I acted in certain ways in each world. And the important thing was to always keep my worlds separate. I didn’t want my friends at school to hear me talking about my faith. I didn’t want my family to hear the kinds of things that were said when I was hanging out with my friends. And I certainly didn’t want my school friends to see me playing hide and seek with my little brothers! Having survived my teen years I can tell you that this kind of fragmented life is not the life God wants for us. God wants us to be whole, to be free, to be the person God wants us to be no matter what world we find ourselves. Ultimately, there came a time when I faced my two biggest fears: my fear of what others thought of me and my fear of love. Whose approval did I really want: my friends’, or God’s? In junior high and high school I was consumed by my desire to be accepted by others. That’s why I was afraid of dance. I wanted to dance, but something whispered in my ear, "You can’t dance! You’re clumsy! People will laugh at you!" In some ways I am still a teenager when it comes to dance. Do you think there is hope for me? Is it possible that I can learn to dance...to be open and free? Theologian Matthew Fox tells the story of a Catholic Sister in Chicago who worked with women in prison. She told the women she had funds which could either get them a good lawyer to review their cases and possibly get them out sooner; or she could bring in a welder to teach them welding so they could have a skill when they left; or she could get a dancer and a painter to come teach them to dance and paint. Ninety-five percent chose the dancer or painter. Why? Because they said it would be the first time in their lives they would have a chance to express themselves. The oppressed and imprisoned need more than money or food or freedom. They also need creativity and self-expression. When you are alone with your thoughts do you find yourself at some deep level wanting the spiritual life God offers? Do you ever secretly desire to be open and free, but are too fearful to step onto the dance floor? What about your problem with depression? What about the way you are afraid to let anyone get too close to you? What about the anger that sometimes gets out of control in your life? A long time ago when I was a youth pastor I was teaching my youth group some rather harsh things about dance. As you know adults often get uptight about youth dancing. The reason we do this is because we see today’s dancing blurring the lines between free expression of bodies and sex. What do you call it today…freak dancing? In the 1950’s there was a huge storm over rock music. A writer in The New York Times Magazine related a story about an Englishman who, while watching Americans dancing the fox trot and the shimmy in the 1910s, asked a friend, 'I say, old boy, they get married afterwards, don't they?' I wonder what that guy would say after watching today’s freak dancing? Dance and new life in Christ. There are so many similarities. The spiritual life is about living, not in the past or the future, but in the present moment. We do not dance in order to get somewhere. We dance around and around. A piece of music doesn't come to an end when its purpose is accomplished. It has no purpose, strictly speaking. Too easily we are inclined to imagine that God created this world for a purpose. We are so caught up in purpose we would feel more comfortable if God shared our preoccupation with work. But God is a playful God. God is a God of leisure, of recreation. I think the key to dance is to see it as a part of your relationship with God no matter where you are, no matter what you are doing. I don’t care if you’re dancing to Christian music like our liturgical dancers, or to the beat of hip hop. You can move your body with the joy and freedom we have in Christ. And you can move your body in ways that honor Jesus as well. Don’t tell my wife, but I think there is hope for me. I recently bought my first mp3 player. I listen to it while running and biking, and it feels like I’m dancing, especially when I listen to Slow Ride, or Listen to the Music, or Smoke on the Water. Every once in awhile I find myself actually singing and dancing at home. But it usually stops when my 16 year old daughter sees me and thinks I’m crazy! But there is hope for me. I could see myself not worrying what Lauren thinks when I dance at home. No matter how many eye rolls I get, I could envision the day when what she thinks doesn’t matter. And I will keep on dancing. One more story. A pastor of a rather formal and strict church was leading a communion service. At one point in the liturgy he was caught up in the power and mystery of God’s love, and he laughed slightly. After the service one woman admonished him for laughing during communion. Later while sharing this with a clergy friend, the pastor said, "You know. She was right. I shouldn’t have laughed during communion. I should have danced at the altar!" As you come forward this morning to share in this holy meal I invite you to come in a spirit of dance. Cut the ties that are keeping your spirit fastened to the ground. Be in touch with the wonderful gift God has given us in Jesus. Feel the freedom Christ offers you in the bread and the cup. And don’t be surprised if you discover yourself dancing to the altar! |
The St. John Web Site needs your input! Click here to leave feedback Copyright © 1998-2004 Jon S. Dawson. Last modified: February 01, 2009
|
06.01.03 - Dance of Life (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4)
